Fatherhood

So I had a job interview today for a position as an instructor for one of the state’s departments. Got home early, ate a 12 point lunch, changed into slacks, white shirt, tie, steel-toe bomber boots, and drove to the interview site about four minutes from my house. The interview went really well, however, since 22 people signed up to interview, the interviewers can only choose from among the top three in terms of overall central-office scored apps, I probably won’t make the cut. Maybe next time.

Back home again the phone rang, and I had to run a related errand. When I finally changed out of dress clothes I can wear again thanks to a net loss of about 16.5# (I gained a pound to get back up to 170), Caution-Lady wanted me to look after the baby while she went to the store.

Coming late in life to fatherhood, I had a goal, and it was never to change a diaper.

Shortly after she left I heard El Ninito sqaulling. He stank. I couldn’t leave him in that. No diaper-roulette this time. I knew what it contained. Without vomiting I got through the ordeal, and so did my son, all clean and still screaming. My younger brother and family bought me two harmonicas and one shaker-egg for Christmas. I’ve found the shaker-egg amuses and interests the baby when he’s protesting a change of diapers. Holding the egg in his hands and shaking it, or against the bottoms of his feet while shaking it seems to produce a sensation he finds distracting and interesting. But not today.

Then, I put him in his cradle and rocked it while reading to him from a children’s book entitled Just in Case You Ever Wonder, getting choked up a bit at the last couple of pages. May have shed a manly tear, but the baby wouldn’t have noticed, as much as he cries.

Getting choked up is the damnedest thing. Emotions have no real value, their expression fails to verify depth or sincerity. Although mine are subject to the observation and analysis of my intellect, they continue to coexist with the great and arrogant brain.

Be grateful there’s no picture today.

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